DAYTON, OH — Local software consultant Derek Paulsen, 38, activated airplane mode on his iPhone before a Thursday flight to Phoenix and, without any ambient digital content to absorb, inadvertently developed a coherent worldview and several original conclusions about the nature of existence before landing.
Paulsen, who has not sat alone with his thoughts for any measurable duration since downloading his first smartphone application in 2014, reportedly stared at the seatback tray table for approximately eleven minutes before what he later described as “something cracking open in a good way.”
“I had no podcast, no Instagram, no news ticker,” said Paulsen, who appeared visibly changed at baggage claim. “Around minute forty I started thinking about where I came from. Around minute ninety I had what I can only describe as a direction. It was alarming and honestly a little wonderful.”
“He was in 14B. I looked over around hour two and he was just… sitting there. No earbuds. Eyes open. It seemed dangerous at first, but he looked peaceful.”
Seatmate Carol Finch, 61, a retired librarian from Scottsdale, confirmed the account. “He was in 14B. I looked over around hour two and he was just… sitting there. No earbuds. Eyes open. It seemed dangerous at first, but he looked peaceful.”
Paulsen said he spent the final hour of the flight mentally composing what he estimated was a prayer, though he acknowledged he was “rusty on the format.”
At press time, Paulsen had landed, disabled airplane mode, received 114 notifications in eleven seconds, and lost every single one of his conclusions.



