GLENBROOK, OH — A routine administrative review at Cornerstone Baptist Church has revealed that the congregation’s governing constitution, last amended in 1994, still lists “ownership of a functioning VCR for home sermon lending purposes” as a condition of active membership in good standing.

The document, discovered when associate pastor Dale Fricker, 44, attempted to locate the church’s quorum threshold for an upcoming elder vote, also specifies that congregational announcements must be submitted on “3.5-inch floppy disk or legible handwritten index card” and that the Wednesday evening service shall conclude in time for members to “return home for the network news.”

Church administrator Paulette Odom, 61, confirmed that a bylaws revision committee was formed in January 2019 to address what was then described as “a few minor updates.” The committee has since scheduled eleven organizational meetings, of which four achieved quorum, and has produced a draft table of contents and a subcommittee.

“We want to be thorough. These are governing documents. You don’t just rush a constitution.”

“We want to be thorough,” said committee chair Gerald Whitmore, 73. “These are governing documents. You don’t just rush a constitution.” Whitmore added that the subcommittee on the VCR clause is expected to present findings no earlier than the fall session, pending a quorum.

Legal counsel consulted in 2023 advised that, technically, the church has been in violation of its own bylaws since approximately 2008, when the last known member VCR was donated to a garage sale without formal congregational approval.

At press time, three prospective members had been placed on a membership hold pending clarification of the VCR requirement, two of whom were not alive in 1994.