Politics
Congressman Who Has Voted 'Present' on Every Bill This Session Describes Self as 'Most Bipartisan Member of Congress'
Congressman Introduces Term Limits Legislation While Serving His Sixteenth Term
Rep. Gerald Hutchins, 74, calls term limits 'the defining reform of our generation' from an office he has occupied since 1994.
Ezra Kim · March 18, 2026
Congressman Attends Own Town Hall Disguised as a Constituent, Is Not Recognized by Anyone
Rep. Dale Hutchins, 58, spent 90 minutes asking pointed questions at his own event before being handed a comment card and told to wait his turn.
Hannah Torres · March 17, 2026
Congressman Leads Moment of Silence on House Floor for Legislation He Personally Voted to Kill
Rep. Dennis Caulfield, 61, paused to honor the bipartisan infrastructure bill he single-handedly blocked in subcommittee four months prior.
Ezra Kim · March 16, 2026
Congressman Proposes Mandatory Moment of Prayer Before Each Floor Vote, Has Missed 74% of Floor Votes This Session
Rep. Dale Hutchins says the measure would restore moral seriousness to the legislative process.
Hannah Torres · March 16, 2026
Congressman Forms Bipartisan Task Force to Study Why Nothing Gets Done in Congress
The task force has not yet met, pending formation of a subcommittee to schedule its first meeting.
Ezra Kim · March 15, 2026
Governor Declares State of Emergency, Realizes Midway Through Reading It Aloud He Has No Idea What It Does
The proclamation was signed, laminated, and framed before staff confirmed it carries no legal authority.
Hannah Torres · March 14, 2026
Congressman Introduces Landmark Bill, Discovers It Is Identical to Bill He Voted Against in 2019
Rep. Gerald Moss, 61, calls the legislation 'bold and necessary,' having apparently forgotten his floor speech opposing it.
Hannah Torres · March 14, 2026
Congressman Introduces 847-Page Bill, Praises It as 'Common Sense Legislation' Having Read the Title
Rep. Douglas Holt says he is 'fully confident' in the bill's contents, which he describes as 'the part before the hyphen.'
Ezra Kim · March 13, 2026
State Legislature Passes Resolution Declaring Official State Prayer, Nobody Can Agree on What It Should Say
The resolution passed 97–1. The prayer itself has been in committee for nine months.
Ezra Kim · March 12, 2026
Congressman Actually Reads Bill Before Voting, Colleagues Deeply Unsettled
Rep. Dale Huffman, 58, of Ohio spent 11 hours reading the 847-page legislation, a practice leadership described as 'a little much.'
Ezra Kim · March 12, 2026
Senator Proudly Announces Landmark Bipartisan Bill Supported Entirely by Himself
Sen. Douglas Hale calls the legislation 'a bridge across the aisle' despite having zero co-sponsors from either party.
Ezra Kim · March 12, 2026
Congressman Personally Reads Constituent Letter, Triggering Full Staff Emergency
The freshman representative from Ohio bypassed his office's form-letter system entirely, causing what aides are describing as 'an unprecedented and destabilizing act of direct democracy.'
Ezra Kim · March 12, 2026
New Bill Would Require All Legislation to Be Written at Fifth-Grade Reading Level, Lawmakers Say It Would Be an Improvement
The bill itself was written at a third-grade reading level as a proof of concept. It is the most widely read piece of legislation this session.
Ezra Kim · March 11, 2026
Politician’s Prayer Breakfast Attendance Spikes Suspiciously During Election Years
Data shows a near-perfect correlation between his prayer breakfast appearances and the proximity of a contested primary.
Ezra Kim · March 10, 2026
City Mayor Proclaims Official Day of Prayer, Accidentally Issues It for a Different City
The proclamation was signed, framed, and delivered to Riverside before anyone in Springfield noticed.
Ezra Kim · March 10, 2026
Town Hall Meeting Devolves Into What Experts Are Calling ‘a Secular Altar Call’
By the end of the evening, three residents had come forward, two were weeping, and the city manager was laying hands on a zoning map.
Ezra Kim · March 9, 2026
Congressman Who Hasn't Visited District in Three Years Schedules Four Town Halls in March
Rep. Dale Furman of Ohio's 9th suddenly very interested in what residents of Millbrook think.
Ezra Kim · March 9, 2026
Poll Finds 85% of Americans Agree Country Is Headed in Wrong Direction, Cannot Agree on Which Direction Is Right
The remaining 15% said they weren’t sure there was a direction at all, which researchers classified as ‘existential.’
Ezra Kim · March 8, 2026
Campaign Ad Promises ‘Return to Values,’ Candidate Unclear on Which Values Specifically
When pressed, the candidate listed ‘hard work, family, and the other ones’ before pivoting to infrastructure.
Ezra Kim · March 7, 2026
Local School Board Meeting Enters Fourth Hour, Attendees Begin Speaking in Tongues
What started as a discussion about the lunch menu devolved into what one board member called ‘a Pentecost nobody asked for.’
Ezra Kim · March 6, 2026
Senator’s Filibuster Now Longer Than Any Sermon in Recorded History
At hour fourteen, he read from the Book of Numbers. Colleagues say it was the most engaging portion.
Ezra Kim · March 5, 2026
Both Parties Claim God Is on Their Side, God Declines to Comment
A spokesperson for the Almighty issued a brief statement reading, ‘No comment at this time,’ which both parties interpreted as support.
Ezra Kim · March 4, 2026
Politician Claims to Be ‘Man of the People,’ Has Not Been to a Grocery Store Since 2014
His most recent estimate of the price of a gallon of milk was ‘about two dollars,’ a figure that was last accurate during the Obama administration.
Ezra Kim · March 3, 2026