GLENDALE, AZ — Daniel Faust, 42, a middle school vice principal, achieved what he described as “total and complete inner peace” at approximately 10:47 a.m. Saturday during a guided meditation in his living room, only to lose it entirely eight minutes later when a woman in a silver Kia Sorento took the parking spot he had been waiting for at the Target on Bell Road.

Faust told reporters he had completed a fifteen-minute mindfulness session that ended with the instructor saying, “Carry this stillness with you into the world.” He said he felt “genuinely transformed” as he drove to Target, noting that he let two cars merge ahead of him on the way — something he described as “unprecedented.”

The peace ended at 10:55 a.m. when a woman identified only as “the Kia lady” entered the parking row from the opposite direction and pulled into a front-row spot that Faust had been signaling for with his blinker for approximately thirty seconds.

“I was a new man for eight minutes. I had compassion. I had clarity. Then she took my spot and I said things that I cannot repeat and that my meditation app would not endorse.”

Faust’s wife, Denise, 40, who was in the passenger seat, confirmed that Daniel’s response included “a word I have not heard him use since 2019” and a steering wheel slap that activated the horn. “He went from ‘namaste’ to ‘absolutely not’ in under a second,” she said.

Faust said he eventually parked in the back of the lot and sat in silence for two full minutes before entering the store. He described the walk as “a pilgrimage of humility.”

At press time, Faust had downloaded a second meditation app specifically designed for use in parking lots and was reading reviews with what Denise described as “desperate optimism.”